MUSIC: "You Can't Roller Skate In a Buffalo Herd"
INSERT: Studio logos.

Cut to:
Grainy footage of a man in a cowboy hat with a guitar, singing the song:

COWBOY
(singing)
You can't roller skate in a buffalo herd.
No, you can't roller skate in a buffalo herd.

CUT TO:
INT. BACKSEAT OF BLUE SEDAN - DAY

The music cuts out. We hear the sounds of a very noisy car in the
background. JAKE sits in the middle of the backseat, between his
friends ROB and PAUL. They're all about 16 years old.

JAKE
Yeah you can.

ROB
Can what?

JAKE
This song. You can roller skate in a
buffalo herd.

ROB
It's just a stupid song. Besides, you
can't.

JAKE
You totally can.

ROB
I don't know why you'd want to anyway.

Quick zoom and freeze on Jake's face, making a whooshing noise.

FADE OUT

MUSIC: Acoustic guitar rock introduction begins.

CUT TO:
EXT. PARK - SUNSET

Jake roller skates alone in a park at sunset, moving toward the
camera.

NARRATOR (V.O.)
In a nation that said you can't.

FADE TO:
Same scene, from a distance, Jake rolling away.

NARRATOR (V.O.)
He said, "I can."

CUT TO:
INT. CLASSROOM - DAY

Jake stands up at his desk, interrupting his TEACHER's lesson.

JAKE
I'm going to roller skate. . .
In a buffalo herd.

MUSIC: Same song, but now the music starts to gets heavy.

CUT TO:
INT. SCHOOL GYMNASIUM - DAY

Jake roller skating in the school gymnasium.

CUT TO:
Crowds in same gymnasium cheering.

CUT TO:
INT. JAKE'S HOUSE - NIGHT

Jake and his JAKE'S MOM stand in front of the sink.

JAKE'S MOM
The song says you can't do it.

JAKE
And I say I can!

CUT TO:
EXT. JAKE'S HOUSE - NIGHT

Jake wipes off a bloody nose as he walks toward the front porch of
his house at night. His FATHER stands on the porch. They look at
each other meaningfully.

JANEY (V.O.)
Jake, you're throwing your
life away!

CUT TO:
INT. JANEY'S HOUSE - DAY

JAKE and his girlfriend JANEY sit on a couch.

JAKE
This is my life.

CUT TO:
EXT. OUTSIDE - DAY

Jake looks past the camera importantly, standing proudly in
the daylight.

JAKE (O.S.)
To prove that stupid song wrong.

CUT TO:
EXT. CITY STREET - DAY

JAKE'S GRANDFATHER and Jake sitting on a bench at a bus stop.

GRANDFATHER
You really think you can do it, Jake?

JAKE
Yes, grandpa. I know I can.

They embrace.

CUT TO:
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY - DAY

Jake walks ahead of Paul in a hallway full of lockers.

PAUL
It's just a stupid song, man!

CUT TO:
EXT. PARK - DAY

Close up of Jake tying the laces on his skates.

INSERT:
Text: "In a land governed by rules"

CUT TO:
Something inanely patriotic. With roller skating.

INSERT:
Text: "He dared to challenge everything"

MUSIC: Hip hop remix of "You Can't Roller Skate in a Buffalo Herd"

CUT TO:
EXT. JAKE'S HOUSE - NIGHT

Same porch scene as before, but now Jake and his father are talking.

JAKE'S FATHER
You could lose everything, son.

JAKE
Without this, dad,

CUT TO:
Jake sits down next to a tree overlooking a valley at sunrise.

JAKE (V.O., CONT'D)
I have nothing.

CUT TO:
A buffalo herd, dominating the planes.

FADE OUT

INSERT:
Text: "Buffalo Herd."

NARRATOR
Buffalo Herd.

INSERT:
All those credits that go at the end of a trailer.
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About John D. Moore

Writer, cartoonist, filmmaker, and student of Japanese language, literature, and cinema at the University of Utah.

3 responses »

  1. Yarjka says:

    I’d watch this film for the buffalo.

  2. Logan says:

    I started to LOL at MUSIC: Hip hop remix of “You Can’t Roller Skate in a Buffalo Herd”

  3. Zijjo says:

    Nicolas Cage, then we’ll talk

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